Friday, December 3, 2010

Eat, Pray, Love...on Soul mates

Image Credit: Soul Mates by Shelley Schoenherr
"...a true soul mate is a mirror, the person who shows you everything that's holding you back, the person who brings you to your own attention so you can change your life. A true soul mate is probably the most important person you'll ever meet, because they tear down your walls and smack you awake. But to live with a soul mate forever? Nah. Too painful."

Thus opines Richard from Texas, Elizabeth Gilbert's friend in her phenomenally successful Eat, Pray, Love.


Long story short: Elizabeth couldn't seem to recover from grief when her relationship with the man she considered her soul mate--her "perfect fit"--finally and permanently ruptured. However, Richard from Texas flatly observed:
"David's purpose was to shake you up, drive you out of that marriage that you needed to leave, tear apart your ego a little bit, show you your obstacles and additcions, break your heart open so new light could get in , make you so desperate and out of control that you had to transform your life, then introduce you to your spiritual master and beat it. That was his job, and he did great, but now it's over.
Problem is, you can't accept that this relationship had a real short shelf life. You're like a dog at the dump, baby--you're just lickin' at an empty tin can, trying to get more nutrition out of it. And if you're not careful, that can's gonna get stuck on your snout forever and make your life miserable. So drop it."
Elizabeth protests. She loves David. She misses him. But Richard from Texas is relentless:
"So miss him. Send him some love and light every time you think about him, and then drop it. You're just afraid to let go of the last bits of David because then you'll really be alone, and Liz Gilbert is scared to death of what will happen if she's really alone. But...if you clear out all that space in your mind that you're using right now to obsess about this guy, you'll have a vacuum there, an open pot--a doorway. And guess what the universe will do with that doorway? It will rush in--God will rush in--and fill you with more love than you ever dreamed."
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Perhaps some soul mates are too painful to be permanent. Certainly looking into the mirror isn't necessarily easy or pleasant. It may be uncomfortable, even downright painful.

Perhaps it could be true that the most important person you'll ever meet can't remain with you. Because it would not be good for either of you.

Who are the people who have opened us up to the universe, who have created doorways inside us allowing love to enter? Send some love and light every time you think about him or her--whether that person is near or far, whether here or gone.

It's the least you can do for the one whose mirrored image opened you and set you free.

4 comments:

Thomas said...

This is tangential at best, but: I think Richard's story would have been a much better movie.

Beach Bum said...

Perhaps it could be true that the most important person you'll ever meet can't remain with you

Sort of why I believe in reincarnation. Maybe we have to go through several cycles to understand ourselves and our soul mates.

Jan said...

I agree with Thomas about the movie.

Dava Castillo said...

The two words that struck me about soul makes were "perfect fit." Can there ever be perfection in a relationship? Personally, I don't believe there can be, and seeking it conjures the less appealing personality traits like suspicion and perhaps even jealousy and questions of self esteem--"Am I good enough for this person."

Soul mates accept each other for who they are, not for who they think they should be.